Tuesday, May 15

stronger for it

i feel as if i start this letter to you with it is raining outside you might stop reading for i have said that often as of late but alas it is and right now as i look out a millions beads of rain stick to the window pane and in doing so it  creates the most beautiful light and although i would like to to speak more about that light, there is another kind of light i would like to speak off and that is the one that i feel inside (please forgive me if that sounds silly).  Yesterday and every time i read your comments, emails and letters i feel little beads of energy, inspiration and gratitude. those things combined help challenge me, push harder and trust my gut and when i do these things i feel lucky. lucky a word i have been using a lot in my life, specially lately. so even though i wrote just yesterday of heartache i also know how much stronger i feel after it.

Life brings us obstacles of course it does but in giving us those things that challenge, make us momentarily feel weak are also those things that help build braver guts, minds and hearts. I sit here typing these things and i look out into the living room, passed the crackling fire in the wood stove and i see cats & dogs lying about, i know if i was to get up my horses Tolstoy and Splash will be knee high in lush and very so delicious grass, chickens and ducks will be swimming and digging for any insects they could find and if i was to look in the mirror perhaps after all this i would not be as quick to look away but instead stare at the her i have become and the lines on her face and say but it was all worth it and I have no reason to need more than that.

so thank you for sharing with me bits of you, i am stronger you see because of it.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello! I read your words and getting stronger by the fact that this is not just me. good photo :)
... Russian writer living in Vermont, to be closer to the archives, which he needed for his work and even the nature of Cavendish it was like Russia. this house belongs to him, his son comes to visit this house, and the residents of Cavendish kept secret of the Russian writer) is very touching.

Ms. Becky said...

finally, another who loves rain. i thought i was alone, but no, i am not now i know.
when i wake to a rainy day it makes me happy like no other. your photos are life. thank you.

Anonymous said...

When I first found your blog I was amazed at how much everything I've ever thought or felt was right here in words written by you. Even though so many things are different about us, they're really not. I feel an energy and inspiration everytime I visit you here.
You are an incredibly thoughtful person and I appreciate your honesty and sincerity in what you write and though I wish you had no heartache right now, I know you will write beautiful things about it, helping me and all of us.
Sarah

Cannelle Et Vanille said...

i feel so lucky to call you my friend nadia. the light... inside and out.

Sweet Life Farm said...

Your photos, your words, the sharing of your soul, Nadia, an inspiration and oh so truly, stirringly beautiful. Today, something has shifted inside me too. I picture the cracks in us that allow more light in and out; cultivate our tenderness. I love these photos, especially the ones of your cats. Blessings, Stacy

cloudgathererholdmedown said...

it should always be worth it, and if it's not, make it so.


these photos remind me of stills from a tarkovsky film. beautiful.

Unknown said...

be strong, it means?
Being sensitive is not weakness. Be sensitive to actions and thoughts is the best thing that happens to people wise and you're one of them, I enjoy every one of your post. makes me look inside myself and analyze my feelings, I thank you for it.

sandy said...

Such a beautiful blog and beautiful words that make so much sense to me. I too love the rain, and breathing in the wonderful scents that really can't be put into words, although you have seem to have done that.

We've gotten a lot of rain too.

I love your writing, your photo's your heart, your blog ♥

Dawn said...

The surprise of finding friendship, support, and kinship from people we've never met, through little electronic notes...it's so amazing, isn't it?
Thank you for all you are, and all you share.

Claire said...

Your beautiful words and lovely photographs are a gentle pause in my day. You exude a peace through pictures and prose as I have never encountered before. Thank you – thank you for bravely sharing with strange people you do not know and yet you change us/me/our days for better with each post. Thank you for giving me a pause in my too hectic day to stop and look and think and take the focus off me and onto you! ...a sister in the rain...

Rebecca said...

And thank you so much for sharing bits of yourself with all of us. You are a breath of fresh air in this crazy, hectic world. I love to stop by La Porte Rouge and spend a few minutes staring at your lovely photos. It's a quiet moment of peace in my busy day. And I'm so envious of your rain. Please send some of it my way.

Catherine said...

As always, such lovely photographs and prose... thank you for sharing them with us.

CorinneLouise said...

Beautiful cats, inspiring words, thank you.

kimberly said...

Your words are magic, but alas, leave me wanting to come over for coffee this afternoon... I LOVE the images - especially the second one~
xx

kimberly said...

Your words are magic, but alas, leave me wanting to come over for coffee this afternoon... I LOVE the images - especially the second one~
xx

Silène said...

Je suis vraiment désolée de ne pas suffisamment connaître l'anglais pour apprécier vos textes...
Mais pour vos seules photos, je tiens votre blog pour un des plus beaux que je connaisse. Je n'ai jamais rien vu d'aussi fort, sur toute la blogosphère....