a lot of someones.....

rain came followed by warm weather and now the snow has gone. it is later into the night i am sitting by the fire. i had not planned to post and even now i am searching for words.  perhaps i can mention the two coyotes that have been spending their days here, one is a beautiful red almost like a fox, the other has grey spots and half a tale without fur. i started looking at them through binoculars but now they are so close  to the house that just today i had to scare them. can i confide in you, i have watched them so much that i feel as if they are part of the farm- which is not good for a place with chickens and ducks. i wonder how to shut it off the thing in my heart that falls in love with all things, the one that wants to take care of them. these last few days my heart and mind has been on other things, things i just can't get use to. no matter how many times i tell myself to get over it, i just do not understand how i have been chosen not to be a mother. ( i know heavy right?) so sorry i will get over it or used to it one day. i just needed to tell  someone a lot of someones.....

la brume

dearest friends i have been thinking of you guys, i have not asked in a while how are you?

are you feeling pressure or diving into the season. i am torn from the want to skip over the holidays and wanting to pour myself into it. the fog on the hill has returned and i am glad, he has become  a familiar friend, a calmer of sorts. my camera sometimes she pushes herself and gives me a few shots here and there, i am not ready to leave her or let her leave me although i must confess to wishing for a companion camera for her and me. i have this tiny dream that a few of  you would  come spend some winter days with me. we would sit by the fire, make soups and inspire, maybe read books out loud have an impromptu dance party and perhaps walk through the forest, sled down the hill and snap some shots here and there. i must run now, meeting a friends for some real coffee in a different state, did i tell you there is no good coffee in vermont they try though atleast they try.