yesterday an impromptu evening walk with a friend, a late night mocha and to our surprise a giant outdoor screen of willy wonka and the chocolate factory ( the original of course).
yes i know perfect!
but also this thought
i am glad that i do not have television, well channels. i would not want to see all commentary on his death, speculation, finger pointing, people who want a minute of fame. so this post is on what i know;
you made me want to dance a whole lot. you made me want to sing all the time even being tone deaf like i am. you had me begging my mum to stay up late on weekdays to see you perform one of your magical moves and i spent hours the next day practicing with friends and hell yes i can do the moon walk! i watched your videos and they were artistic inspiration- visionary work.
i can not imagine your childhood. we have seen that it must not have been easy and i wonder where was that one person telling you that you were great for who you are, not what you can do. i wonder if your mother ever read you a story in bed. if you had to perform even when you were feeling sick as a boy. did you attend school and make friends of your very own and use tiny scissors to cut colorful paper. i think about your self esteem being a number and how much you must have disliked yourself so much to want to change every single thing about you, i wonder how money and fame hungry were these surgeons that did this damaging work to you. I wonder if you felt real love and had butterflies in your belly. now i do not know what is true and untrue about the things that would make you a monster, i hope not micheal. i hope not. but if it is so i am so sorry for everyone and wonder if you can still make it better in heaven stop the cycle kind a thing. that you did not find peace in your future makes me sad. because when i remember my youth, teenage years there is happiness, singing, being zombies on the front lawn.
thank you for that. now rest and find that peace.
