It has been a long while, i never meant it to be. I had hoped to fill these pages with Poet and her wonderfullness, because there is so much of it. I hope to do so shortly but i must just write what my heart is asking me to write but know dear friends if you are still there, i have an incredible life and all these months that have passed have been filled with happiness more than anything else.
I am sitting upstairs above my cafe, shop and market, life has changed i have added these things to my days, it has cost me a lot, not reffering to money but it has given me alot once again i am not reffering to money. It has until very recently been were all my energy and drive has gone. Oh gosh even as i type this i feel this malencholy ache for where i left off the simple life that was Poet and i on the hill. It is fragmented now and we are everywhere and being pulled in so many directions. temporary i say, balance will come yet there is no complaint here all is as it must be for the future of what i hope it to be.
I have had some of the kindest moments and experiences this past winter and spring and they helped me move forward and keep focus. I have also heard kind words and the worst all in one opening of mouth. My heart has soared and felt a tare on the same day. I have lost my balance, fallen, picked myself up all within minutes. It easy to blame others, well maybe not so easy- i am good at taking blame, it is safer, more bareable. My shoulders ache, my neck aches i blamed it on all the false shade ( airconditioning) maybe it is something else, maybe it is the dissapearing kindness from those i love but maybe it is dissapearing because i have emptied....
photograph of a place i stayed early summer in the south of france (hosting a workshop)
