not from the hill, but all so lovely

i had hoped to leave you with a hill post before i departed for france but time did not allow for that, so instead i write to you from the medieval village of Beynac in Dordogne. it is early morning here, still dark and i can hear the rain from my open window. Days have been filled with work, meeting new people, making new friends and all things french. I have eaten my weight in baguette and figs. the above photographs are  just a quick few as we shot and picnicked in a walnut grove. chickens and geese made me think of the hill and the animals, i am told all is well with them, (thank you sarah).

i hope you are all doing well and that the early autumn is good to you, a bientot! 

behind the scenes, a new friend and a film

last april the very talented ryan marshall came to the hill to film aran's book trailer. aran, jon and miren along with ryan spent a few days on the hill. It was a very exciting time, my good friend aran was going to film a book trailer for her first cookbook and she wanted do it it here on the hill and she asked ryan marshall to film her trailer, who i had for a long while been admiring through his extremely well written and open blog pacing the panic room.  even though he has stopped writing it, it is worth a visit and i secretly wish for him to return to it ( okay not so secretly:).  what a treat it would be to have my home, the animals and my things be part of it.

Aran and the children did so well, as aran and ryan filmed,  jon, miren and i played, how close i felt to them and how fun it was to watch their mama do so well.  Ryan fell in love with the hill and his vision and calm ways made the experience so wonderful. the original plan was to shoot an early spring but the weather had other plans and cold and dampness took over, so we lit a roaring fire that never went out, we cooked, chatted and shot through out the days. In the evening we would sit by the fire after dinner exchanging stories.

 ryan who i picked up from the airport around midnight quickly started asking questions and gave me some good advice and still does,  he was what you read on his pages, kind, talented and way cool.  I had just received my x100 camera gifted to me by Kimberly and was getting used to shooting it that weekend.  Ryan would hear me mention the fog the name i named my camera that no longer worked, he would have this big smile and would say things like wow, you really loved that camera and i can not believe you shot most of your blog with your nikon d70.  later on he would tell me that the nikon d70 was his very first digital and how special it was to him and how he was keeping for his little girl. one day as we were getting ready to shoot he said to me " nadia i want you to have my d70 and when i get home i am mailing it to you" i could not believe it and of course i said you can not do that with tears in my eyes. I felt ryan's kindness from the very minute i met him but this was beyond that and i found myself very moved by it and again asked the question why would someone do that for me. a few days later i received not only a camera, but lens, a bag and book, such an act of pure kindness to someone he just met, i was beyond touched. ryan's generosity has not end there, he has given me things to think about, kind words through emails and always complimenting me on my own body of work.

I felt very lucky that week even though i worked hard, there i was watching my dear friend aran doing a wonderful effortless job in front of the camera, looking so beautiful, the children playing, laughing and showering dogs with love and even a bit for me too and on top of that i got to see ryan capturing the hill the way i see it, it such away that i knew and felt that i had nothing to worry about, for he would not spoil the hill but instead make it even more beautiful through his impeccable artistic vision and incredible talent. thank you ryan for your friendship and kindness.

aran congratulation what a very special time this all is, well deserved.

dear friends here is the beautiful collaboration that took place on the hill between aran, the children & ryan.

Small Plates & Sweet Treats from The Panic Room Videos on Vimeo.

to can purchase aran's beautiful book here

*the song is called Snowglobes By Rickolus you can find his beautiful music here

seeing the light, opened by friendship

early this morning, after a good sleep which is very rare for me i grabbed a sweater and a hat, a dog and my camera i set out for a walk, i needed it. the cool air greeting my lungs and i felt every breath. that my dear readers is also how the last few days have played out, i have purged so much unwanted clutter that has been piled in the walls of my heart and mind that every inhale and exhale has been felt.

this is not the post i promised to write about other peoples lives, the city and their success and i will but today i needed to write about being in the shadows and how i never minded it, in fact i have been pretty good at it my whole life, but as of late their has been such an unbalance that i am afraid i woke up and felt smothered by the lack of light i have received. I have for the very first time in my life a group of people  in my life who care for me, this perplexes me for truth be told i have not done anything for them in comparison to what i have done for others yet they somehow when i am speaking with them put me first and for some reason keep me there, i feel the difference and it is incredible feeling one that is both overwhelming and so kind that my heart feels the bittersweet ache of what true genuine loveliness is.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for believing in the possibility of good in me dear friends.

i read this quote yesterday and although i admit to hating to tell you  who said it ( keira knightly) i found it to be so true.

I don't think that you can fake warmth. You can fake lust,

 jealousy, anger; those are all quite easy.

 But actual, genuine warmth? I don't think you can fake it.

I also have been listening to Jonsi and he my friends can put fairy dust to your every day dream and make your daily life even more magical

a drive, fog, music and happy

i hardly slept the night before, getting stung by a dozen bees or more can make that happen not to mention the below freezing temperature that came upon the hill suddenly. I let the dogs out at the earliest sign of dawn light, dressed and wrapped my neck with a scarf grabbed my bag and rental car keys and headed out. there was fog, i made my way down the new dirt road and unto a paved one and began to shoot, with my phone a habit i am thinking might right about now seem like an addiction. 

i had also found a new radio channel filled with my favorite kind  of music. i drove around bends, through small towns and then unto route seven heading to hudson ny, but captivated by the fog and the lines of the road and textures of trees i found myself behind schedule and decided to go to saratoga a little closer for coffee and just maybe something flaky and sweet to eat.  i did just that i picked up a chocolate croissant at one place and walked into another, a new to me place filled to the rim of people the kind that has a heartbeat and rhythm. i ordered my mocha, looked around for an empty table not one can be found and i proceeded to do something i never did and asked to share a table with someone. he put his hand out and said my name is John and responded that i am nadia and we each turned back to our devices, him his lap top and i my iphone. a few minutes later he asked what i was doing and i told him looking at pics i had taken earlier, we started chatting, laughing and talking photography, a friend of his stopped at the table and we chatted some more then i got up gathered myself and said nice to meet you both and walked out the cafe ( all this was no more than twenty minutes). a few minutes later driving down the road while eating bits of my croissant which is such a treat for someone who is a raw foodie most of the time, anyhow a song came on that i loved, i turned the sound up and lowered my window and began to sang and dance and i mean really do those things with full intent. i am not sure what happened to me, was it the sweet treat or just feeling balanced by a good morning of  shooting,  good conversation, good drive and music. i was happy this is what happy looks like on me.

I shared this story with my dear friend Tzurit last night and as i pressed send, tears fell i recognize them to be the good kind the kind that comes from sharing a moment that reminds you that you are still breathing strong with a friend who will get exactly what you mean.

*images taken with phone.